NO TITLE
by darkmage009
Summary: Last time I remember, Tezuka holds a tennis racquet and not a zanpaktou sword. Atobe's aiming to be the Shaman King and Fuji's new name is Gin Ichimaru. Paranoia
1. Soul Reaper Fuji

Disclaimer: Takeshi Konomi and Tite Kubo would kill me for this.

Notes: The author is experiencing sleep deprivation and this is the effect it has on her. This fictional story is made on impulse (literally on impulse I tell you) and the author would like to see the reactions and reviews of the people who have read this. If the reviewers think negatively of it, the author would readily dispose this story any time.

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**First Encounter: Soul Reaper Fuji**

Tezuka ran as fast as he could as if he was feeling something dangerous following him around. He looked back for a second but no one was following him. He slowed down for a moment but was still on his guard.

"That was weird," he said. He turned his head around and walked away when some great force pushed him ten meters from his original point. He lied flat on the hard cemented floor with a bleeding forehead.

He turned his head on the direction of the force and saw a guy wearing a black kimono and hakama, the guy was wielding his sword on an invisible figure.

The guy turned around and smile at him.

"You're badly injured Tezuka," the smiling guy commented.

"Fuji?" Tezuka asked incredulously.

"What is it? I'm busy fighting can't you see?"

"I can't see anything,"

"Oh right, you're a human. I'm fighting a thing called hollow,"

"Hollow? Wait we're supposed to be…wait, let me check something," Tezuka opened his bag and pulled out a Shounen Jump manga. He read it in an incredible speed.

"Fuji we're supposed to be normal junior high school students playing tennis,"

"What's our relationship in that story?" Fuji asked as he slashed through the hollow's body. Tezuka could only see Fuji idiotically slashing the wind.

"We're teammates of course,"

"That's boring isn't it? I want something more exciting," he smiled cheekily. The hollow caught his hand and threw Fuji away. Fuji's body crashed on the wall.

"You destroyed the wall! How can you compensate for that?"

"Shouldn't you be more worried for me?"

"I'm still lost in this story. Why are you in that suit? Why are you fighting the wind? I don't understand,"

"I'm not fighting the wind. It's the hollow ok? And I'm a shinigami,"

"What? But you're supposed to be Fuji Syusuke the sadistic smiling prodigy in tennis. How can you be a shinigami?"

"Tezuka just shut up for a while. Here, pierce my heart with this shikai and I'll share my shinigami powers with you,"

"Why?"

"It's so that you can kill that damn hollow!"

Tezuka dragged Fuji's sword and lift it up. Having no choice at all, he pierced the sword on Fuji's heart. Instantly speaking, Tezuka's uniform vanished only to be replaced by the same clothes Fuji has. He saw the monstrous thing Fuji was fighting a while ago and slashed it skillfully.

"I did it Fuji! Fuji?"

Fuji was being carried by a guy who wore bandana and expensive looking shades. Tezuka remembered him.

"You're Abarai Renji from Bleach right? What are you doing here?"

The guy took off his glasses and smirked. Tezuka gasped.

"Kaidoh? Is that you? What are you doing wearing that thing? And why are you carrying Fuji?"

"He committed a heinous crime in the Soul Society. He needs to be punished and killed,"

"You're forgetting you're famous grunt," Tezuka reminded.

"Fssssh…. Is that ok?"

"Yeah, well anyway…hand over Fuji,"

"I told you this guy committed a crime in Soul Society. He is the subordinate of that traitor Aizen Sousuke who killed the entire Central 46 chamber,"

Fuji's eyes opened at that instant.

"That's not me, Its Ichimaru Gin,"

"Don't fool me,"

The gates leading to Soul Society opened its doors and Kaidoh, along with the unconscious Fuji, walked towards it. After what seems like ten seconds had passed, Fuji punched the innocent Kaidoh and glared at the dumbstruck Tezuka.

"You're supposed to shout 'Fuji!!!!' with all of your voice, honestly what's wrong with you,"

"But I'm lost for words,"

"Nevermind, just rescue me in Soul Society got that? You should approach Inui by this time now and ask for him to open up a dimensional door. Don't forget to train ok? I'll be waiting in Seireitei, head towards the tallest white tower ok? Goodbye,"

Fuji smiled one last time at Tezuka before dragging Kaidoh's unconscious body. The door heading towards Seireitei gradually disintegrated into nothing. Fuji was eternally gone from Tezuka's world as the bespectacled guy vowed to save Fuji from the clutches of evil.

To be continued…I guess.


	2. Former Captain Inui

**Disclaimer: **The author is not destroying the good image of those popular Shounen Jump manga mentioned here.

**Note: **Not only is the author suffering from sleep deprivation, she is also experiencing excessive sneezing due to mild colds. Almost everybody is saying that this is silly, stupid and so random. I guess that's a positive response. This story has no plot whatsoever and shall continue to follow the rampaging flow of the river towards doom.

If you don't know anything about Bleach or other Shounen Jump manga releases then don't bother reading. You'll be lost.

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**Second Encounter: Former Captain Inui**

"Inui, I need to talk to you,"

"You want to go to Seireitei to save Fuji? You want to open up a dimensional door that will lead you to the Soul Society? Do you want to know why Tennis no Oujisama's plotline is so messed up? You want to train harder in order to fight for the ones you're bound to protect? You want—"

"Actually I just want to return to the original version of Prince of Tennis. I'm just a handsome bespectacled guy that is known to be of the level of a national player, I'm just a mere player with unbelievable prowess in tennis you know,"

"You're awfully arrogant today Tezuka. You're crossing the boundaries of being considered OOC!"

"OOC?"

"Out of Character," Inui explained.

"What the hell, we're already out of our character the moment this story was made," he grunted.

"Just tell me what you want from me; we still have other things to do,"

"Alright, Fuji ordered me to save him in that so-called Seireitei. Honestly that place is in Bleach storyline how come Fuji's involved with this?"

"Ah, too many questions Tezuka, but for now you should blindingly follow what Fuji has told you to do,"

"What choice do I have? Inui, how come you know all of these things? Are you also involved in this pandemonium?"

"To tell you the truth Tezuka, I'm not really the Inui you know who specializes in Data gathering and the one who makes Inui Deluxe Juice. I am more than that,"

"Then what are you?" Tezuka grimaced.

"I am the founder and the first president of the Shinigami Research Institute and the former 12th captain in Soul Society—I am Inui Sadaharu, a mere honest perverted data specialist,"

Tezuka pulled his Shounen Jump manga once again and glared at Inui.

"But that's the role of Kisuke Urahara, Inui you're not making sense,"

"No questions; just follow me,"

Meanwhile in Seireitei,

"I told you I don't know who Aizen is! And I did not commit any treacherous crimes!"

"Foolish one, you think you could fool us with that pretty face of yours?"

"But I am _not_ Ichimaru Gin!"

"Don't deny the obvious, you have that sinister smile on your face and perpetually close eyes. How can we be wrong?"

"The last time I read Bleach, Ichimaru's hair is silver not light brown!"

Fuji's complaints were drowned when the commander-captain of Gotei 13 appeared at the scene.

"Hey old man, you're from Rokkaku right? Have you seen Saeki?"

"What utter disrespect are you saying? That is Shikeguni Yamamoto-Genryusai you are speaking to!"

"But you're that old man in Rokkaku, that weak, weird, old geezer right?"

"Yes, I am indeed that person,"

Several of the shinigamis gasped in utter disbelief.

"See I knew it," Fuji beamed.

"However in this story I am to be depicted as the strongest captain—"

"The oldest, you mean," Fuji corrected.

"Yes, yes… no! This child irritates me; lock him up in that white tower before the execution,"

"Hey wait I haven't finished explaining! I'm not Ichimaru Gin!!!!"

Back at the Human World,

"At last, the door connecting to Soul Society is finished! Tezuka you may step through that door now,"

"I still don't know what's happening but I'll bring Fuji back, I swear,"

"You should be able to use the full potential of your zanpaktou now, be careful,"

Inui leaned closer to Tezuka but Tezuka slapped his face.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm giving you a good luck and good bye kiss Tezuka,"

"You want to be the first person to experience my bankai?"

"No, ok I'll stop,"

"Well then, I'll be going now," Tezuka walked closer to the door only to be stopped by a huge figure.

"Ka…Ka-Kabaji?"

"Osu,"

"Now, what are _you_ doing here?"

"Kabaji is here in behalf of Ore-sama's orders," a drawling voice spoke. It was Atobe.

"I cannot let you pass that dimensional door that leads to the Great Spirits! You'll have to fight me first!"

"What Great Spirits? What are you talking about?"

"In order to become the strongest Shaman King, I have to beat you and gain the Great Spirits! Kabaji kill him!"

"Tezuka, be careful! Kabaji is a kyonshii, a guardian zombie that is manipulated by Atobe's Jufu talisman!"

"Now that explains Kabaji's face!" Tezuka unsheathed his sword and cut Kabaji's limbs.

"Atobe listen to me, that door leads to Seireitei not to some weird, freaking Great Spirits!"

"Silence! Ore-sama does not listen to you're lies,"

"Atobe you're messing up the story! This is infused in Bleach story line not Shaman King!"

"Die!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Tezuka gasped, unable to comprehend Atobe's attacks. Atobe smiled evilly as he pulled out his talismans and utter a spell that would kill Tezuka. Tezuka could only close his eyes as thoughts of Fuji came swirling on his mind.

To be continued…I guess.


	3. Quincy Oshitari

**Notes: **Forgive the randomness. This is totally pointless. The author has lost her mind.

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**Third Encounter: Tezuka's Companions—a Quincy and an orange-haired girl?**

"Santen Kesshun, I reject!" a distant voice shouted. Tezuka opened his eyes to see himself still in whole piece.

"Oh my, I'm still alive?"

"You're still alive?" Atobe shrieked.

"Yes I am!"

"No you're not!!!"

"I am!!"

"You're not!!!"

"Are you alright, Tezuka? Man, that was lucky," the person owning the voice kneeled down to squeeze Tezuka's face in the person's ample bosom.

"Orihime Inoue?" Tezuka managed to say when he saw a mass of orange-brown hair and two pairs of hairclip on the person's hair.

"Oh no, I'm not Orihime! Look, look, I'm Sengoku from YamabukiMiddle School! Lucky," he stated gleefully as he crushed Tezuka's head on his breast. Tezuka pushed him away.

"What the hell, how in the world did you have breast like _that_?" Tezuka pointed rudely, aghast.

"Oh, silly they're artificial you see? They're made from water balloons!" Sengoku pulled one of her breast and showed it to the horrified Tezuka. He squeezed it too hard and the water splashed Tezuka's face.

"I don't know if I should thank you or kill you," Tezuka said lividly.

"You should thank me first," Sengoku beamed. Tezuka unsheathed his zanpaktou.

"No, Tezuka-kun, don't rape me!!!" Sengoku screamed in a very girlish way and several more veins popped.

"I'm killing you! Not raping you!!!"

"No Tezuka! I'm still a virgin!!!"

"You're forgetting something very important!!!"

"Who are you? Can't you see Tezuka's going to rape me?" Sengoku screamed.

"Ore-sama's presence is still present in this scene! Don't ever neglect Ore-sama's presence!"

"Who's Atobe?"

"Saa…" Tezuka replied.

"You're not Fuji!"

"I wanted to say 'saaa…' why do you care!"

"You have no right to say 'saaa….' That's not your line!"

"I'm fed up with 'yudan… whatever!"

"Kabaji attack them!!"

But even before Kabaji can strike, a glowing arrow pierced his chest and Kabaji fell on the ground—double dead.

"Whoa! That was super lucky!!" Sengoku wiped his forehead.

"Show yourself!" Tezuka shouted and a man in white robes appeared. Tezuka's mouth was hanging open.

"Ishida Uryuu?" he confirmed.

"WRONG."

"Noitora?"

"DUH."

"Aaroniero??"

"I'm not a freak! And were still in the Seireitei arc not Hueco Mundo!"

"We are?"

"Yes, I read the latest chapters in Shounen Jump Weekly."

"Then who are you?"

"You can't remember me!?"

"No. I hit my head, I think."

"Oshitari Yuushi at your service," the guy replied curtly, pushing his glasses upward.

"Oh my GOD what's happening to this story!!!!" Tezuka shrieked as he pulled his hair.

"We have to get Fuji out of Seireitei!"

"I have to get another breast-balloon first!!"

"Ore-sama is still here in this scene!!!"

"What the hell is happening? I swear, as this Shounen Jump manga states—"

"We don't have time Tezuka! Only your zangetsu could help Fuji!!! You want to save your princess right??"

"Yes but he's not my—"

"Man, I really need those water balloons guys!!!"

"Ore-sama will be the next Shaman King!!!"

"What the F—"

"Don't swear Tezuka! Children might be reading this!"

"I don't care!"

"The portal is closing!!!" Oshitari yelled.

"Fine! We're going!!!" Tezuka bellowed in defeat!!!

"I'm coming!!! I'm sure I'll find another water balloon in Seireitei!!!"

"Ore-sama will join—"

"You stay there freak!" Sengoku kicked Atobe's face.

And the gate towards Seireitei closed forever. The adventures of the three abnormal guys have just begun.

To be continued I guess.


End file.
